Archive | September 2015

The Greedy Elite Club

                                    meal-762625_1280

Waitress: Good evening sir, welcome to the Greedy Elite Club Diner, we are happy to be of service to you. Can I help you?

The Greedy Elite Club Member: Can we have a table for two please; one facing the Self-righteous side if you can please.

Waitress: I guess today it’s your lucky day, we just cleared it now. Come this way please.

***

Waitress: Are you ready to order now?

The Greedy Elite Club Member: Yes, we are. Can we have Abusive, Aggressive, Chauvinistic and Backstabbing for appetisers please?

Waitress: Good choice, my good sire. Will you want wine with that?

The Greedy Elite Club Member: What do you have?

Waitress: We have a 100 year old Cold-hearted, 1801 Corrupt, Cynic’s Materialistic, Machiavellian, Opportunistic Conniving Scheming Reserve, Snobbish, Suspicious, the 2001 Unsympathetic Negligent Narcissistic Series and the rare Power-hungry Racist Sexist Blend.

The Greedy Elite Club Member: I’m more of Manipulative wine type, what do you recommend?

Waitress: The Stingy Opinionated Misanthropic wine produced in Pretentious Town and which is the Manager’s Choice. It comes in a bottle.

The Greedy Elite Club Member: Then Stingy Opinionated Misanthropic wine it will be.

Waitress: No problem and what would you like for a main course?

The Greedy Elite Club Member: No, thank you, that will be all for now.

Waitress: Let me know when you’re ready to order the rest of your food.

***

The Greedy Elite Club Member: Excuse me, we are ready to order.

Waitress: What would you like to order?

The Greedy Elite Club Member: Can I have Merciless, Pride, Pig-headed, Self-serving, Macho, Vindictive, Vengeful and Unethical. The lady here would have Melodramatic, Inconsiderate, Predatory and the Dishonest Schemer salad. Make sure there’s no Peace in it, she’s allergic.

Waitress: Would you like anything else?

The Greedy Elite Club Member: That’s all. Thank you.

Waitress: Certainly.

***

Waitress: Would you like to see the dessert menu?

The Greedy Elite Club Member: No thank you, can I have the bill please.

***

To all the Gypsychavians – much love 

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